I always thought that turning 30 was such a noble event. Growing up it equivocated the epitome of adulthood and independence. I always had this notion that everyone in their 30's had it figured out and life would be exactly what you wanted.
While that's not the case, the lessons I have learned over the first three decades of my life have molded me to become wiser, stronger and more self-aware of who I am, who I want to be and what to hold important throughout our short duration of time on earth.
Here are thirty lessons that I hold close to my heart:
1. Don’t dig up in doubt what you sewed in faith. Often times when God has blessed us with things we have prayed for. Whether it’s parenthood, a new job, marriage, at fines we start to doubt our abilities and allow our insecurities cultivate our self-doubt. We must remember God has not brought us this far to fail us.
2. Trust your gut.
3. We have instincts for a reason, use them.
4. A good cup of coffee can be life-changing.
5. It’s important to have boundaries. In both our personal and professional lives people will test you in the best and worst of ways. Knowing your boundaries and how to respectfully outline them can save you from unnecessary emotional and mental stress.
6. Be careful who you divulge your passions, dreams, and secrets with. My mother always said “Your right-hand doesn’t need to know what the left is doing” meaning, not everyone needs to know everything. Not everyone in life is rooting for you to win.
7. Protect your peace. Toxic relationships have no place in your life. Period.
8. God is always working on your behalf for your greater good. When I look back on seasons of my life that seemed the most chaotic in hindsight I realize every time God was setting me up for the next season of my life. Trust your course and know in the end, you will be okay.
9. Life’s short. Eat the pasta/ice cream/etc. Self-care is important. Don’t feel guilty for taking time to yourself. Sometimes you need a day of self-reflection. Make time to treat yourself to a movie, a mani/pedi, a nice dinner, massage, whatever makes you feel whole and happy. You deserve it.
10. Silence can be a powerful tool. Know when to use it.
11. The most valuable asset we have is time. Use it wisely.
12. It’s not your job to fix people. Everyone has baggage unless you’re a therapist it’s not your job to “fix people”. Sure, offering words of encouragement or lending a helping hand to a friend in need is never wrong but taking on the responsibility and emotional weight of better someone else is not your job.
13. If you meet ten assholes in a day, you're probably the asshole.
14. Your wardrobe should be an investment.
15. Thoroughly read documents before signing and ask questions.
16. Choose logic over emotion. always.
17. Few people in life will truly get you. Keep those people close.
18. Don't reply when you're angry.
19. Street smarts are equally if not more important than book smarts.
20. It's okay to move on from situations, relationships, jobs, etc. that do not serve or fulfill you.
21. Face your problems before they face you. You can try and spend your life running from your issues but in the end, if you don't face them head on, they will conquer you.
22. Kindness will take you far in life.
23. It is important to learn how to be alone.
24. Occasionally, disconnect from social media and learn to live in the moment. Sometimes when we try and capture the moment, we miss the moment entirely. Not everything needs to be on social media.
25. If you want to be happy, you must learn to be grateful.
26. Save. Whether it's $1, $100 or $500. Every month put something aside for a rainy day.
27. Prayer works.
28. Everyone's love language is different. We must be aware of how others give and receive love.
29. Listen to your body. Your health is important. Our bodies were built to send us signs when they are under stress or attack. Document those funny feelings and get checked out if you start to see a trend.
30. Some seasons are meant for growth while others are for humility. Life is not all about you. We are all a piece of a bigger picture and we have to know when to humble ourselves and when to put our needs first.